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“Reality is what we take to be true. What we take to be true is what we believe. What we believe is based on our perception. What we perceive depends on what we look for. What we look for depends on what we think. What we think depends on what we perceive. What we perceive determines what we believe. What we perceive determines what we take to be true. What we take to be true is our reality.” Zukav The dancing Wu Li Masters 1979

This quote frazzled my brain a bit when I first read it! To put it simply, it means that our reality is based on our perception. Now before you go into some existential crisis, can you just begin to imagine what that means? It means that how we perceive ourselves and the world around us is based on our own beliefs and values. Most of the time these work well for us but when we have a negative belief for example ‘I am worthless’, or I am a failure’, the two most common beliefs I come across, you can see how these could affect your perception of success, of your self belief and in relationships with others.

So what do we do when we come across a negative belief?

Think of a belief that is limiting you and follow these steps to transform it.

1. See it for what it is: a perception that developed based on a past experience.

2. Ask yourself for evidence of how accurate this is, what is the real picture? Is your belief absolutely true? What are the exceptions? When is the opposite true?

3. Ask yourself, if I continue to believe that, what are the consequences for me and others? Do I want that to happen?

4. Ask yourself, what would my life be like without that belief? Who could I become, what could I achieve, how would my relationships with others be like?

5. Now, what do you want to replace that belief with that would serve you better? The choice is yours.

As you find yourself trying out a new belief, it can feel a bit different a bit of a strange fit at first because you aren’t used to believing this yet. So build a picture of that belief if it were true. What would it look like or imagine yourself saying it to yourself or maybe even find the place in the body where that new belief can live. Just try it out and notice the difference it makes to the quality of your thoughts, feelings and experiences. So when you realise you can shape your own reality because it’s based on your experience from the inside out , that’s a really useful thing to know and practice.

Jill Tonks

Jill Tonks


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