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This article from positive psychology news shows how positive emotions can be helpful in moderation only. Over optimism can result in risky behaviours and decisions.

So often when working with clients with anxiety or depression or just really unhelpful habits and behaviours, the negativity inherent in these traits serves a purpose. Clients who come to see me have used all their will power to change but nothing changes. The reason for this is that the unconscious mind has developed a pattern in response to a previous problem. What is a problem now used to be a solution to a previous problem that has outlived it’s usefulness. As we work together and get to the bottom of how and why this problem started, its a bit like maturing the part of ourself that isn’t working anymore.

So often when we resist the negative aspects of ourself, they become stronger. When you accept and understand them they can transform and become something more helpful and often more powerful as the tension between the conscious mind and the unconscious dissipates and resources are unlocked.

Let me give you an example. I’ve been working with somone recently who has an alcohol problem and felt as if his life was on pause. He traced that feeling back to being bullied at school, long before the alcohol was an issue. The connection was that he wanted to stay at home with his family in response to the bullying and the alcohol had been part of a withdrawal pattern at an unconscious level to protect him. When we matured this part of him,it was like the play button was pressed and he was able to get back in touch with his desire to follow a career as a teacher which he is now doing.

If you want to get back on track and take the handbrake off your life, embrace and understand any negative traits you have, it can make a big difference!

Jill Tonks

Jill Tonks


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